Time banking en vraagverlegenheid

Time banking is een sociale interventie uit de Verenigde Staten en Engeland. Binnen Time-banking ruilen mensen, meestal buurtbewoners, diensten voor uren. Een Timebroker bemiddelt tussen vraag en aanbod en zet mensen in hun kracht zodat ze kunnen deelnemen aan TimeBanks. Aan het woord Timebrokers Reyaz Limalia’s van Fair Shares time bank  en Philippe Granger van Rushey Green Time Bank

Reyaz Limalia's:

Do you recognize that some people are hesitant to ask for help?
Yes. It’s generally an issue across the board.

How does the Time Bank help to make it more easy to ask?
The way to tackle this is to really emphasise the two way nature of Timebanking, and that it isn’t volunteering. Volunteering for many people means charity, and to ask for help means accepting charity. We need to make it clear that Timebanking is a way that everyone can support each other, and they need to get over that mental barrier. Sometimes we need to make sure we get the person helping others (even creating artificial assignments). So they can see how it works, and it’s important that the people they are helping aren’t charity cases. Once people do get into the swing of things, it tends not to be a problem. That give and take nature does kick in after a while. But quite often there is that initial hesitation.

Do you recognize that people are hesitant to offer help?
I don’t think people are hesitant to offer help. What I do think is that sometimes people are not aware of what their own capacity to help is. We have people who think they can do everything, but really can’t. Others think they have nothing to offer, but are actually very capable.

So some people need a lot of pushing and encouraging. We have one chap who has no self-confidence at all and is just really scared to help. But in fact, I’ve seen him work, and he’s a very talented handyman and carpenter. So I’ve had to really push him and force him to do assignments. This particular chap suffers from depression, and was referred to us by his care worker. They both agree that he needs to get more involved in the community, and have meaningful things to do. So when he is doing something, he is really happy, but he’s always scared about taking on a job.

How does the Time Bank help to make it more easy to offer help?
I think a huge strength of Timebanking is the flexibility of what you want to do, and how often you want to do it. This is something that I try to really drum into people when I am joining them to the time bank. I make sure they understand this, and get them to be really honest about what they want to do, and what they can do. I always say to people, don’t tell me the skills you have. But tell me about the skills you really want to share with people. So for example, many people can wash dishes, or do the ironing. But nobody ever wants to do it – So don’t get people to offer that. If you have a gardening job, ask the person who really loves gardening, rather than the person who’ll do it begrudgingly, and I think it’s very rare that they will say no.

Philippe Granger:

Do you recognize that some people are hesitant to ask for help?
I see this everywhere I go, and many of us have this problem! “It is easier to give than to receive’ is probably universal. This could be for one or several reasons like: we are shy, too embarrassed to ask, we don’t want to bother others, ‘waste their time’, we don’t want to be seen as ‘takers’, we fear being rejected, we are used to fixing things ourselves, we want to show/prove that we are self-sufficient and independent, previous help has not been helpful, we are used to pay with money to get things done, paying with cash also feels ‘safe’ as it is a one way transaction with no further connection with and commitment to the person I paid to do the job, we don’t want to feel that we have to pay back in kind, that we owe, have a debt to someone, we have grown up in an environment which has taught us not to trust others.

How does the Time Bank help to make it more easy to ask?
The sense of community, the development of friendships, honesty, transparency, respect, increased communication, acceptance, and the practice of time banking - all lead to an increased sense of trust, generosity, safety, feeling connected. It is also in that spirit that we are not so inhibited and where it is acceptable to take risks.

Do you recognize that people are hesitant to offer help?
Yes. This could be for one or several reasons like: we are shy, we lack confidence, we are afraid to fail, we may think other have too high expectations, we lack experience and/or training, we fear being rejected if we don’t do a good job, we think our knowledge and skills are insignificant, worthless, we live in a culture where people have become self-sufficient

How does the Time Bank help to make it more easy to offer help?
Same as above, plus with a loving family around and in which we practice the core values of time banking, we will grow in self esteem and self-confidence. Time banks are pools of knowledge and skills, and the multiple relationships that flourish within a time bank provide a platform to promote and share the skills and time that we each have. We can also be motivated to offer help because we can earn time credits that will benefit us when we need help!

What also facilitates give and take in time banking is that I don’t have to return a favour to the person who has helped me. People pay each other with time credits that can be exchanged with anybody, at anytime, anywhere, and not necessarily between the same two people. I can choose who I want to exchange with, and I can take my time to develop my relationships in a way that feels safe to me and others. There is no pressure to perform, or be someone that I am not.

Another way to foster relationships is to create social events and group activities that will bring people together. It will get them to work together and learn from each other. It is often in those moments of informal conversations that we find out others around us have what we need, and we have what they need.